Perhaps my best week so far. I returned 1.7%, my worst performance to date.
The paradox is resolved by the fact that I felt I had greater control over my emotions and actions through the week. In an effort to preserve my equity I have started starving the less profitable element of my trading approach of capital, and even though the gods of probability were less generous than they have been in previous weeks, I didn’t try to ‘force’ a result. This is how I believe it should be; that is, in the short-term the trading result should be irrelevant, a mere by-product of one’s actions and behaviours.
Nevertheless I am only going to give myself a score of 8 out of 10 for following the road map. I have made efforts to improve diet, exercise, and to better connect with reality, and I believe I am making steady progress with respect to strengthening my trading discipline, but as I have noted previously, I am yet to be tested by the market. It’s true that I feel I am a little stronger, but my gremlins could be quietly regrouping in a dark corner of my mind, biding their time and waiting until I am exposed at my most vulnerable, before striking out with a vicious ferocity. History of my past behaviour tells me to keep a vigilant guard. Profits are good but I really need to look a loss in face and see how I deal with it. When I am tested in this manner only then will I know what I am really made of. Until then, I just have to admit that I do not know myself all that well.
PS – The meaning of the picture is less obvious than the previous selections in my ‘trading results’ posts. I chose the image to represent our endless quest for knowledge and acceptance of the idea that our understanding of most phenomena will forever be incomplete.